Losing your slice of the "American Dream"

While sitting in my divorce attorney’s office he looks at me with a stern look and asks, “Who kept the house?” Looking back I respond, “There is no house to keep”. His response, “Hmmm typical!”

Californians have entered an era where losing our homes is as common a topic as what dentist we go to. We all know someone who is suffering with this loss. Although we know these people we do not know how they are dealing with this loss socially.

Living through the years where house prices rose and interest rates were almost non-existent, Californians received a huge slice of the “American Dream.” Many people began to buy homes with low “teaser” rate mortgages and the outcome was homeowners upside down in their mortgage. People also seemed to be spending more than they were making. Whether they were spending $4.90 a gallon to fill up their super-duty diesel trucks or spending $100 to fill up their SUV’s and take the boat to Tahoe, society was feeding an economy that had just been ignited.

As the flame moves down the fuse you know that it is going to discharge yet you don’t walk away, instead you stand there in your five bedroom house and wait until it all explodes. When the explosion occurs you look at your husband while holding your new Gucci purse and say, “It was your fault!”

The ramifications of the economies decline effect humanity differently. Californians continue to focus on the financial loss and aspects that contributed to their fall and ignore how it has impacted their personal lives.

When we leave simplicity and begin living an extravagant life reality gets more and more distant. As enjoyable as it may seem, when it all disappears you are left completely empty. There was nothing to compare us for the disappointment that we would face after the life that was pretty much handed to us on a silver platter vanished.

I am not saying that the people who took advantage of the economies peak were to blame, I was one of those people, but it sure was easy to get swept off our feet by a blazing piece of dynamite.

What society continues to overlook is the emotional effects that the decline of the economy has had on its victims. Whether the effects are you losing your home, your job, a pay cut or everything, it has affected each and everyone one of us differently. Socially it could be divorce, alcoholism or depression that has taken a toll on the emotional well being of the people suffering this loss. When couples begin to play the blame game it is a precursor to divorce. When a man feels like he could no longer support his family he can become depressed.

Eventually the economy will improve and people will be able to recover financially. Emotionally I am not sure that will happen so easily. When you have the “American Dream” ripped away from you it is hard to want that lifestyle back. When your status drops from middle class to lower class overnight there is no way to conquer that emotionally.

My attorney says it best when he chuckles and says, “Look at the bright side at least there is nothing to fight for.” He doesn’t understand the loss that so many of us have dealt with. Divorce attorneys are financially better than ever. His fuse has not yet been lit and for his sake I hope he escapes it but I do know that things eventually turn upside down. After all karma is a bitch.